Maybe like me you fantasized about sneaking up to the teacher’s desk when she was not looking, grabbing her pad of hall passes and writing one for yourself? Or, maybe you really wanted to sneak away from your home to wander where you knew your parents would not approve of you going or being who they did not want you to be. “Mother, may I?”
“No, you may not. Take seven scissor steps backwards!”
Granting myself permission to be who I want and do what I want and go will I will? Not so easily done. In addition to the teacher’s power to keep you in class, there is the parent’s power to keep you under control, and the spouse’s power to keep you near and loyal.
Do you remember standing inside your father or mother’s shadows when you were a child? This shade might have felt comfortable to you then. But, now, no. Is this allowed? Is that allowed? Do I need to check in? Do I have PERMISSION? Stepping out of the shade into the sun feels freeing. Not always safe, but warm.
So, you have a hall pass to go wherever you wish. Do whatever you want. Be whomever you choose. Scary, huh? Not just that, only your signature goes on the pink slip.
“Just where do you think you’re going, Mister/Miss Priss?” Oh, yes. I forgot to warn you. There will be hall monitors. Hag teachers. Bully boys with sashes labeled: “Safety Patrol”. Maybe even the Principal (not your pal).
Not only that, the stakes will be higher. Hall monitors may be your boss bidding you adieu so that you can find employment elsewhere (where your soul is demanding). Or, it may be your spouse, “You want to do WHAT?” All that education and now you want to run a bicycle shop? But, but our standard of living; what will the neighbors think? That is not who I married!” RIP to your old way of life. Say hello to the You that has been waiting for a long time for the larger story of your life.
Write yourself a hall pass now. Take a risk. Your soul applauds you.